To my girl Jett,

As I write you this letter, you are only 2.5 years old and even with your little baby temper, you love me unconditionally.  By the time you read this letter, you will be well into your adolescents and most likely loathing both your dad and I.  That is exactly why I need to share so many things with you now in this email.  By the time you read this your face will be full of acne, your hormones will be raging and you will most likely spend the majority of your time avoiding us.  While this already breaks my heart and makes me sad for what will one day inevitably be, I can only hope you will listen to what I’m saying here.

Before we had kids, I always said I wanted 3 boys.  The thought of having a daughter truly terrified me and I didn’t believe I could handle all the stress and responsibility of raising a girl.  We never found out what we were having when I was pregnant with you and your brother and to be honest, I was somewhat relieved when Jagger was born and he was a boy.  However, the second you were in my arms I realized you were everything I never knew I needed.  My fears were immediately lifted and all I felt was this  incredible love for the girl who stole my heart.

Jett, being a girl is no easy fete. You will be consumed with thoughts of, Am I pretty enough? Smart enough? Popular enough? Skinny enough?  And while the answers will always be yes over and over again from us, you will constantly feel inadequate and that kills me.  You will never believe us when we tell you how beautiful you are and it scares me that you may follow in my footsteps and suffer from poor body image and develop food issues at a young age.  Your dad and I will always remind you how beautiful and strong you are and unfortunately it will never be enough.  You will feel pressure from your friends to look and act a certain way, even if it doesn’t feel right to you.  You will be pressured to drink alcohol, and do drugs and while I realize its all part of growing up, I fear for what may follow.  Will you be safe?  Will you know to call us if you ever feel scared?  Will you know not to drink and drive?  I can only hope we do our job well enough and that you will always know we will never judge you by your choices and always be there for you.

And then comes the boys.  Your life will be consumed with them and they will give you the highest of highs and the lowest of lows.  One day a boy will break your heart into a million pieces and all your dad and I will want to do is pick them up and make you feel better( and then go punch him in the face). But you will think we don’t understand, and won’t want to come to us for help and support.  You won’t believe we ever felt heart ache and will never think we had these same experiences you did.  You will fall in love, you will break hearts and you will have to put yourself out there.  And it’s all so very hard Jett. It’s hard when all your friends gang up on you, it’s hard when you’re there first one to develop and get boobs and its hard when the boy you have a monster crush on, is into your best friend instead of you.  Being a girl is hard but we will always have your back and be here for you.  So please remember that and know that you will never have to go through anything alone.

The relationship between a mother and daughter can be something so incredibly special and all I can ever hope for.  While I can’t imagine this, one day your brother will leave me for his wife and she will become the most important woman in his life.  You and I however, we will always have each other.  I hope we can go on girls trips, and shop for your prom dress, and find your first apartment together.  I hope we talk on the phone every single day and I hope that I will always be your first phone call. Whether it be something exciting that happened or because the boy of your dreams left a bar with your best friend, I will always be here for you.

Please always remember Jett, no matter what path you choose and no matter where you end up in life, we will love and support you unconditionally.

Love forever and always

Your Mama

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